Yes, I Know What You Seek…

For I am Felinius the Mystic, whose glowing eyes see all that is hidden in the heart of avarice. You have journeyed far, adventurer, in search of the Ancient Orb of Orberforb, whose unspeakable power can lay waste to entire… No?

Then ye must seek Aphrodite’s Amulet, cursed with the ability to transform any man into a helpless slave of love, doing the erotic bidding of… Not that, either?

I have powders and tinctures prepared by the hand of Hippocrates himself, said to cure any known… well, what then?

Satan’s Sandals? The Hope Diamond? Mickey Mantle’s World Series home run ball? I have some mint condition Beanie Babies in the back that you…

(sigh) Down the hall to the left, past the vending machines, look for a sign that says “Restrooms.” You could have just said that.

which category

Submitterationist Stephanie knows that we seek “Bella, the most beautiful and fairly smart cat ever (still going strong at 17) after a recent surgery to remove some bumps. She really didn’t like the cone of shame so the vet tech suggested a ‘onesie.’  As you can see from the photo, she is much happier with that.”

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13 thoughts on “Yes, I Know What You Seek…

  1. michael ficklin November 24, 2015 / 8:35 am

    Yes, I can just see her ‘happiness’.

    • jerzowa November 24, 2015 / 9:29 am

      Yeah, she’s positively gleaming with it 🙂

  2. Faye November 24, 2015 / 8:50 am

    Coffee spitting funny. Wow! A glaring cat in a onesie. I’m done.
    NTMTOM I’ll be careful what I ask for. Lol.

  3. Gigi the cat lady November 24, 2015 / 10:22 am

    I wouldn’t go in for cuddles just yet if I were you. 😉

  4. Saffron November 24, 2015 / 10:53 am

    GENIUS 😀

    Stephanie I hope Bella is feeling better soon. She is extraordinarily beautiful.

  5. inchbranch November 24, 2015 / 11:15 am

    “Ancient Orb of Orberforb.” I love NOMTOM.

    And I just snorted coffee out my nose.

    • allein November 24, 2015 / 12:53 pm

      You’d think everyone would know better than to drink and read at the same time by now.

      • Faye November 24, 2015 / 1:46 pm

        Morning brain fog before we sip the coffee then BLAM!

  6. Tamara November 24, 2015 / 11:35 am

    Bella is beautiful! Even with evil laser eyes and a snarly nose. Onesie instead of massive cone seems much easier to deal with, what a great idea!

  7. Smartypants November 24, 2015 / 4:22 pm

    Bella: “I’ll let you live, because you did this to help me. But you should check your shoes…forever.”

    Lovely kitteh, and I hope she has a speedy recovery!

  8. Clairdelune November 24, 2015 / 4:53 pm

    I was drinking water rather than coffee, so the snort was less messy. 🙂
    Love your mind, NTMTOM. Never lose that twist.

    And Bella is truly worthy of her name! Even with the evil eyes.
    P.S. Bella, a onesie with little stars is a potent antitode to evil eyes, so save the glare for another time. ;-D

  9. Kar November 24, 2015 / 5:05 pm

    You have a different definition of happiness than me.

    I’m surprised she didn’t claw that thing off.

  10. beemoused November 25, 2015 / 6:32 am

    Stephanie, you have got nerves of steel to put a onesie on a cat with such “eyes of sudden death”. Here’s hoping for Bella’s speedy recovery (as well as her forgiveness for your good intentions!)

    Fortunately, I have learned to leave my ice water out of reach while reading this page or I would have choked to death by now!

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