Guide to Catbeard Technique

Combining its enjoyment of self-portrait photography with its obsession for felines, the catbeard may be the purest expression of Internet culture. Obtaining the perfect catbeard selfie requires, in addition to the cat, patience and timing. In figure one, we see near-flawless execution: The cat nuzzles naturally in front of the face, creating the illusion of an elfin nose above a stern bearded frown.


Contrast this with figure two, in which… um… yeah.


From top, Catbeard, by Abi Skipp, licensed under CC BY 2.0; Cat beard, by Rasmus Zwickson, licensed under CC BY 2.0

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9 thoughts on “Guide to Catbeard Technique

  1. whawhawhatsis November 30, 2015 / 5:56 pm

    Wow, nobody’s commented all afternoon? I’m neither witty nor amusing, but I do appreciate all your efforts to be both, NTMTOM, so thanks for making sure we all know the proper catbearding technique. 🙂

    • Not That Mike The Other Mike November 30, 2015 / 6:29 pm

      I exist only to serve humanity.

      • whawhawhatsis November 30, 2015 / 6:33 pm

        And you serve it well. As long as you aren’t serving in the cookbook sense!

    • Deb November 30, 2015 / 7:02 pm

      Busy afternoon…back to work seeing clients and hearing their harrowing stories of how their cat scratched the heck out of the face of a Thanksgiving guest. Yikes!

      • Drude December 1, 2015 / 11:41 am

        Their thanksgiving guest wasn’t using the correct cat-bearding technique, I take it.

  2. allein November 30, 2015 / 11:09 pm


    • Faye November 30, 2015 / 11:57 pm


  3. Smartypants December 1, 2015 / 4:44 am

    Cat: “Man, it’s a good thing you bipeds are so adorable!”

    • Beemoused December 1, 2015 / 6:56 am

      And also that you can work the can opener.

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