63 thoughts on “Handsome, Virile, yet Aloof…

  1. Alison December 3, 2015 / 5:32 pm

    Rock Distant should constantly basically be forced to diagram his own sentences.

  2. Alison December 3, 2015 / 5:47 pm

    How about we have some fun with NTMTOM’S reply? What would be your p star name? (Keeping it clean, folks). Take the name of a street where you have lived and combine that with the name of your first pet. Mine would be Sheena Fluffy. πŸ˜‚

    • Not That Mike The Other Mike December 3, 2015 / 6:37 pm

      I’d be Holbrook Traveler. I sound like a Harper Lee character.

    • allein December 3, 2015 / 9:32 pm

      I’d be Heidi Pine.

      Or I could be West Highland Heidi.

    • Gigi_the cat lady December 3, 2015 / 9:47 pm

      Playing by that rule my porn name would be Princesse de L’Γ©glise.

      In English Princess of the church, not very X Rated in either language LOL!

    • Patty December 4, 2015 / 11:48 am

      Mine would be Ninth Thunder.

  3. Beemoused December 3, 2015 / 6:02 pm

    Freedom Pistachio!

  4. Tamara December 3, 2015 / 6:35 pm

    I would be Glendale Husky….. Wow that sounds horrible!!!!!

    • Deb December 3, 2015 / 6:44 pm

      Not as bad as Bambi Prospect Park West!

      • Mr. Max December 4, 2015 / 5:31 am

        I’d be Quasimodo St. James, not too far from Prospect Park!

        • Deb December 4, 2015 / 6:08 am

          Ha Ha!!

          • debg December 5, 2015 / 1:08 pm

            This particular run of names is totally killing me, people.

            I would be Hemingway Jimmy, not very exciting except for devotees of a certain macho author.

  5. DenverGal December 3, 2015 / 6:39 pm

    Louisiana Ginger. I might not do too badly with that.

  6. sepaz December 3, 2015 / 6:53 pm

    Redonda Jericho.

    She’s got spurs on her boots.

    • Not That Mike The Other Mike December 3, 2015 / 8:56 pm

      Welcome to the site, sepaz! πŸ™‚

  7. Faye December 3, 2015 / 6:55 pm

    Winding Darling. First address: Winding Lane. Current Pet: Dorothy Darling. Sounds like I’m a pole dancer!!

  8. one cranky lady December 3, 2015 / 7:43 pm

    Sunrise Blossom!

  9. birdcage December 3, 2015 / 7:55 pm

    Pansy “the Polecat” Clarkson. At your service.

  10. fkaWaldenPond December 3, 2015 / 8:15 pm

    ‘Thorndale Smokey’ I guess that makes me ‘alt’.

  11. dubravkamcvmd December 3, 2015 / 8:19 pm

    Princess Henry, pretty au courant!

  12. Smartypants December 3, 2015 / 8:37 pm

    Maple Blackie – what am I, a Canadian gangster?

    • Alison December 3, 2015 / 9:04 pm

      Sounds like a type of holiday cookie.

      • Michelle P December 4, 2015 / 8:22 am

        The Girl Guides of Canada will be selling them next year.

        • one cranky lady December 4, 2015 / 3:28 pm

          WHERE DO I SEND MY MONEY?

      • Smartypants December 4, 2015 / 9:07 am

        Sounds good! Maple syrup and, say, either dark chocolate or black walnut pieces? Om Nom Nom.

  13. Alison December 3, 2015 / 9:05 pm

    These are so funny! Thanks everyone! πŸ˜„

    • Smartypants December 4, 2015 / 9:09 am

      Thanks for getting it started!

  14. ffleur2 December 3, 2015 / 9:44 pm

    Shelbourne Snoopy

  15. 6rabbits December 3, 2015 / 10:03 pm

    Southeast Buffy *cringe*

  16. Haha December 3, 2015 / 10:13 pm

    Maple Cedar. I’ll take my boughs and leaf now.

  17. Arne December 4, 2015 / 6:20 am

    Olaus Patricia.

    But, but, but, I’m a man damn it! πŸ‘Ώ

    • Faye December 4, 2015 / 10:06 am

      Go with it Arne.

  18. LunaChickFringe December 4, 2015 / 8:00 am

    Kilborne Auggie. I think maybe I work on an oil rig down undah!

  19. Michelle P December 4, 2015 / 8:21 am

    Lilac Tokyo.

    Rawr.

  20. Dana December 4, 2015 / 8:37 am

    17 Nibbles.

    Seriously.

  21. sixkatlady December 4, 2015 / 9:16 am

    Daisy Ashbrook

    • birdcage December 4, 2015 / 10:02 am

      That’s the least porn-y name possible. That’s the name of the little girl with pigtails who lives across the street. All the little boys are in love with her. She’s a sweet heart – the kind of kid who saves earthworms from the Dread Sidewalk of Dryness after a rainstorm. She shares her toys with her baby brother without being asked, and eats all her vegetables.

      • Faye December 4, 2015 / 10:13 am

        But then as fate would have it…

        • Haha December 4, 2015 / 10:52 am

          …as fate would have it the college application officer accidentally changed an h to an s and her application was sent to a “different school” and Daisy’s idyllic life along with her idyllic name took a drastic change…

          • Faye December 4, 2015 / 6:14 pm

            ….drastically shuttled into the school of hard knocks, Daisy made use of her well nourished mind and past experiences: She networked with her old neighborhood contacts and her brother, who remembered her fondly, and who were more than happy to bankroll her startup Worm Farm. Assbrook became the signature name for QUALITY in the worm biz.

            Daisy once again idyllic. She…

  22. Chris December 4, 2015 / 10:13 am

    JoJo Washington.

  23. Stephanie December 4, 2015 / 11:15 am

    I don’t mean to hijack this fun thread, but what is the point of this kind of spam? I used to get odd little snippets, sometimes full paragraphs that seemed to *almost* have a narrative flow. I actually quite liked them. I pretended they were avante-garde poetry. But I’m not sure what the spambots are meant to accomplish.

    My porn name would be Kippy Fellows.

    • Not That Mike The Other Mike December 4, 2015 / 11:32 am

      The spammers are trying to put links to their sites on my blog by entering a webpage address along with the comment. I assume this is part of an effort to increase Google search ranking for the target page, or perhaps to direct human traffic to a page that infects computers with malware. I delete any links from the post before I reply, so whatever the purpose is, it fails.

  24. Saffron December 4, 2015 / 11:18 am

    Brengle Cheddar
    πŸ™‚

    • birdcage December 4, 2015 / 11:51 am

      I’d eat that. On triscuits.

      • Saffron December 4, 2015 / 3:43 pm

        πŸ™‚

  25. one cranky lady December 4, 2015 / 3:26 pm

    I have to say, as pron-y as some of these names sound, a lot of them sound like characters from one of P.G. Wodehouse’s Jeeves and Wooster books (which are quite funny!) The stories feature an amiable young man-about-town (Bertie Wooster), regularly rescued from the consequences of his idiocy by the benign interference of his valet Jeeves.[

    If you’ve never heard of Wodehouse or Jeeves and Wooster, I strongly recommend renting the Jeeves & Wooster TV series with Stephen Fry and Hugh Laurie…SO good. And they are why I just can’t watch Hugh Laurie as a gloomy American doctor in House!

    • Faye December 4, 2015 / 6:17 pm

      Wodehouse or Python, both work for me in the name department.

  26. BB/VA December 4, 2015 / 6:16 pm

    Route 3 Sandy. Make of that what you will…

    • Faye December 4, 2015 / 6:18 pm

      Oh my gosh! Too funny.

    • Alison December 4, 2015 / 7:43 pm

      πŸ˜‚ Hysterical!

    • birdcage December 5, 2015 / 9:07 am

      Route 3 Sandy might be my fav porn name of the bunch!

      • Faye December 5, 2015 / 10:12 am

        Route 3 Sandy for the win!
        Hmmm… Unfolds map…

  27. myiglets December 5, 2015 / 8:35 am

    I was gonna suggest the NTMTOM add a section for spamade here. Woohoo he’s got the best snark around.

  28. Duckie July 2, 2016 / 5:49 pm

    Fluffy Tim

  29. refined sugars July 16, 2016 / 6:15 pm

    Have you ever considered about including a little bit more than just your articles?
    I mean, what you say is important and all. However imagine if you
    added some great graphics or videos to give your posts
    more, “pop”! Your content is excellent but with images and
    video clips, this website could certainly be one of the most beneficial in its
    field. Amazing blog!

    • Not That Mike The Other Mike July 16, 2016 / 10:44 pm

      That’s… that’s brilliant! I can add pictures to my articles! All these years writing for the Internet, and the secret to success was right under my nose waiting to be discovered!

      But what kind of pictures? Industrial equipment? Victorian-era marital aids? Leather-upholstered dishwashers? Keynesian economists riding farm animals? Animals! That’s it! Everybody loves animals! Simple, elegant… Yes! IT… WILL… WORK!!!

  30. MyIglets July 16, 2016 / 11:53 pm

    Too. Dang. FUNNY! Is it bad that I love this snark SO much? Nah.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Add image after comment (JPG, 50KB or less):