Why I Eyes Ya

This Christmas, give the gift of home security, with the LazerCat 3000 Burglar Annihilation System. While you sleep, LazerCat patrols your home, seeking out and frying unwanted intruders. Also mice, bugs, dust bunnies, items on high shelves, things that aren’t really there, etc.


PENNY IN A BAG, by lovecatz, licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0.

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11 thoughts on “Why I Eyes Ya

  1. Faye December 22, 2015 / 8:47 am

    Warning: wear protection if you attempt to use your unit for laser hair removal or dermabrasion.

    • allein December 22, 2015 / 10:52 am

      The unit has a handy sandpaper tongue for buffing the skin after hair removal.

      • Faye December 22, 2015 / 2:41 pm

        Can provide acupuncture if you touch the buttons underneath the main compartment.

        • allein December 22, 2015 / 2:52 pm


  2. Juno December 22, 2015 / 12:53 pm

    Oh, Don Piano!

  3. Saffron December 22, 2015 / 2:15 pm

    “things that aren’t really there” πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€
    One of my tabbehs did that last night. He stared at a spot on the couch VERY INTENSELY. Of course I looked to see what was here and of course there was nothing there.
    Cats are weird. πŸ˜€

    • Laura December 22, 2015 / 4:05 pm

      They can see into the spacewarp. We’ve had a spacewarp in my house for many years. It’s only accessible by pre-verbal children and animals. Many years ago my daughter toddled into a hallway with my keys and a moment later came out without them. The ONLY place accessible in that hallway was a closet, which I emptied. No keys. Had to get them all replaced. And then a couple months later? She toddled back in there and produced them in a matter of seconds. We’ve accepted that they were in the spacewarp.

      And cats have 24/7 access to the spacewarp. That’s why they’re staring at things that YOU can’t see. Their vision can go around corners in space/time and see the things that are not visible to us humans who’ve attained the age of speech.

      • Saffron December 22, 2015 / 4:21 pm

        So true! πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€
        I think it is also where most of the cat toys that I buy for my kittehs go to…even when I move they never turn up again.

      • Kar December 22, 2015 / 5:00 pm

        That would explain why cats love dryers and the tendency for socks to disappear in dryers.

      • beemoused December 23, 2015 / 8:03 am

        I totally agree! We finally located the “hide-the-toys” spacewarp in our house: It’s under the couch–the one that sits flat to the floor! I’m still trying to figure out the actual transition point–the cats refuse to share.

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