Well, This Explains My Career

And lo, upon the sixth day, Sloth created Man in His image (well, without the claws and so much fur, but never mind let’s move on) and spake unto Man, saying “Behold, I give unto you the vastness of Time. Go forth and waste It.” And Man heeded the word of Sloth, and thus was invented golf and binge-watching and professional bass fishing and Comic-Congress and live-tweeted beard trimming and websites that consist of nothing but pictures of cute animals accompanied by weak-tea satire and Minecraft and YouTube cosmetics unboxing videos and…

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Sender-inner Liz observes “Now we know what became of Shaggy from ‘Scooby Doo’! Also, I want that stained-glass door.” Via Viral Things.

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11 thoughts on “Well, This Explains My Career

  1. birdcage February 4, 2016 / 11:12 am

    BRAVO!!!!! A real tea-spitter of a story! *wipes off monitor*

  2. Emmberrann February 4, 2016 / 11:34 am

    “well, without the claws, and so much fur, and but never mind let’s move on….” coffeesnorted my tee shirt.

  3. Phred's Mom February 4, 2016 / 11:47 am

    Pull my finger, erm, claw?

  4. allein February 4, 2016 / 11:50 am

    websites that consist of nothing but pictures of cute animals accompanied by weak-tea satire

    I wonder what websites those are. They sound fun.

    • debg February 4, 2016 / 12:47 pm

      Don’t they, though?

  5. myiglets February 4, 2016 / 12:12 pm

    Whahaha!! Another good one.

  6. Faye February 4, 2016 / 12:25 pm

    Perfection!! Cosmetic unboxing videos!! Coffee spitting funny!!

  7. Starfish February 4, 2016 / 1:11 pm

    “Behold, I give unto you the vastness of Time. Go forth and waste It.”

    Never has a decree from on high been easier to follow.

  8. Ellie February 5, 2016 / 4:35 am

    Amazing, love it! Thank you NTMTOM for setting up this site – my new daily fix of cute content and witty writing. 🙂

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