My Card

“Rider’s the name, security’s my game. Folks, have you seriously considered the need for a professional security dog? You could be just sitting there, doing your jobs, when suddenly — ninjas! I see it all the time in this business. My proposition to you is: For two bowls of kibble a day and regular belly scritches, I guarantee to┬ákeep your workplace completely ninja-free.”


“Meet Rider, our new office security system.” Via Imgur.

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10 thoughts on “My Card

  1. Mariana Paes April 13, 2016 / 9:11 am

    Rider, you’re hired!!
    Now scoop over here so that I can pay you an advance on belly scritches!!

  2. Julie April 13, 2016 / 9:23 am

    My dog, Chico, sleeps over at my parents’ house at least once a week and over the years, he has also acted as a professional security dog and rid my parents’ house of:

    1. A Cat

    2. Mice

    3. A bird

    We can attest that while professional security dog services can be a little pricey and they are sometimes a little too demanding regarding the belly scratching, it has been well worth the cost to keep our homes free from marauding neighborhood animals.

    Or my parents could just shut the door behind them.

    • bananabreadhead April 13, 2016 / 12:18 pm

      What a great arrangement Chico has with your parents! They must be so grateful to him.

      • Julie April 13, 2016 / 1:38 pm

        Actually, that’s part of why he is there at least once a week. My dad was complaining about mice. After Chico started coming over, no mice.

  3. Emmberrann April 13, 2016 / 9:25 am

    Those ninjas would be too busy cuddling and skridgeling you to be much of a threat, you adorable security force of one. You’d slay them with your cute-itude.

  4. allein April 13, 2016 / 9:31 am

    If I were a pirate, I’d just have to steal him away to be ship security.

  5. Gigi_the cat lady April 13, 2016 / 10:00 am

    I am soooo afraid of pirates and ninjas, please come and protect me Rider I’ll pay you double the scritches!!

  6. Haha April 13, 2016 / 10:52 am

    Yes, all marauders will be reduced to a cooing pile of goo so won’t be able to do any marauding.
    I love the look of patience in the eyes, “Yes, I will sit here and hold this thing like a good boy to humor you, sigh”

  7. Kar April 13, 2016 / 1:56 pm

    I cannot imagine a less fearsome guard dog. However he would make a perfect lap warmer.

    • Not That Mike The Other Mike April 13, 2016 / 1:58 pm

      He’s a great guard dog! You don’t see any ninjas around, do you? I rest my case!

      (Of course, you never do see any ninjas, that’s the point.)

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