Creepy Clown Sightings

Name: Honko  Creepiness: 3/5
Known Activities: Will approach people alone or in pairs. Avoids larger groups. Invites victims to squeeze his nose, saying it will be “funerrific.” When squeezed, nose emits piercing air-raid siren and squirts ketchup.

It’s shriek-splort-tastic!

Name: Ponciello  Creepiness: 4/5
Known Activities: Sings opera in forested areas adjacent to suburbs. Actually pretty good; takes requests. After gaining victim’s trust, asks to come inside for glass of water. Steals silverware and potholders, then flees.

Are… are those crocheted?

Name: Ramblin’ Jack  Creepiness: 1/5
Known Activities: Travels town to town following Grateful Dead tribute bands. Owns complete set of Jerry Garcia neckties, which he displays in his camper. Has plenty of stories to tell, as long as you’re buying.

Man, I hope they do “Truckin’ “
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31 thoughts on “Creepy Clown Sightings

  1. allein 🐾 October 7, 2016 / 8:50 am

    All these doggies’ hoomans might wanna lock up their shoes…

  2. Gigi the cat lady October 7, 2016 / 9:35 am

    I have never liked clowns, they are too loud and brash and the hobo clowns scared the @%?& out of me as a child.

    But I love these cutie pies, altho I think Allein is right and and their humans ad better be careful of their stuff for a while.

  3. fkaWaldenPond October 7, 2016 / 9:37 am

    Ponciello for the win!!!!!!! 😀 😀 😀 Can he do Wagner?! But I will be delighted with O Sole Mio.

    • Murray C. October 7, 2016 / 12:31 pm

      I’d better hide my collection of vintage crocheted potholders!

      • fkaWaldenPond October 7, 2016 / 1:46 pm

        Right?! 😀 😀

  4. JenDeyan October 7, 2016 / 9:43 am

    Ponciello is a 5/5 creepiness, as far as I’m concerned. That’s just weird, man. It would be cute if I could see the rest of his body. Honko’s snout is just too visible and adorable for him to be creepy. I just feel sorry for Rambling Jack. He needs a treat or three.

  5. Ricky's Mom October 7, 2016 / 10:39 am

    The dogs are adorable. Costumes, not so much, not for me. To each their own …

  6. DebG October 7, 2016 / 10:45 am

    Mike, you’ve outdone yourself this time. I was *just* reading about the clown thing last night while dealing with kitty drama.

    So there’s crazy news and good news from my household today! Crazy news: I trapped a young black cat who’s currently living in my bathroom. While I was sitting with him, and probably while I was reading about the clown thing, I heard meows from the front lawn. My walkabout ginger George had decided it was too cold outside and he was ready to come home. He ran away 17 days ago, and I had pretty much given up hope. But he’s back, and he’s fine, and he cuddled me all last night.

    • Smartypants October 7, 2016 / 10:51 am

      Hooray – welcome back, George! That’s awesome.

    • Claire October 7, 2016 / 11:00 am

      Hooray! If you name a cat after George Weasley, I suppose you have to expect some mischief. I’m glad he’s home safe.

    • Faye October 7, 2016 / 11:16 am

      Yay for George coming home! Maybe he figured you might replace him with black kitty. Realized he better maintain his claim.

      The cat vacancy service had a fresh kitty all ready. Hmmm two are as easy as one.

    • LunaChickFringe October 7, 2016 / 11:28 am

      OMG! YAY! SO GLAD your baby came home! I hope he thinks long and hard before doing that again!

      • DebG October 7, 2016 / 11:53 am

        And everybody gets microchipped once payday rolls around. That was terrifying.

        • Faye October 7, 2016 / 12:04 pm

          I believe in microchipping. At least you have a chance they will be reunited with you.

    • allein 🐾 October 7, 2016 / 11:35 am


    • fkaWaldenPond October 7, 2016 / 12:24 pm

      That is wonderful news Debg! Right on!!! Where do you think he got to? Has he lost weight or looking lank?

    • Gigi the cat lady October 7, 2016 / 12:26 pm

      So happy George is back home!! What will you do with the little back cat in your bathroom? Are thinking of keeping him?

      • DebG October 7, 2016 / 3:03 pm

        It depends on his health status and his emotional needs. Right now, he’s completely terrified of me–corners himself behind the toilet. Once we get to the vet on Thursday, I’ll know more. If he’s healthy and wants to stay, I’ll keep him. If he’s healthy and doesn’t want to stay indoors, I’ll set up a feeding station and a Dogloo for shelter in the winter cold, for after his neuter. If he’s not healthy, I may make the same choice I made last week with another stray, to put him to sleep.

        Oh, and I met a nice kitty at the Humane Society who may be coming home with me too. Yeah, I meant to downsize my cat collection as older kitties died off, but there goes that plan.

        No idea where George was. He doesn’t look lank, but he ate most of a can of tuna and drank a lot last night. It took nearly an hour to coax him with that tuna. Silly boy.

    • Murray C. October 7, 2016 / 12:33 pm

      YES!!!!!! I was thinking about him and started to get that “oh, no” sort of feeling and I’m happy to be able to say I was so wrong.

    • Jan October 7, 2016 / 12:43 pm

      Hooray for George!

    • amylizs see October 7, 2016 / 1:54 pm

      So glad George is back home, safe and sound!
      And Mike, you have outdone yourself once again with this clown post. Thanks for the laughs…it makes Friday even better! ( And these dogs make the least creepy clowns I’ve ever seen! )

    • Julie October 7, 2016 / 6:03 pm

      Yay! I’m so glad your cat came back home!

    • 6rabbits October 7, 2016 / 8:35 pm

      Yay! So glad he is back! Microchipping is an excellent idea!

    • Laura October 7, 2016 / 11:40 pm

      Oh, wonderful! I’m so glad George is home! And he’s fine – that’s fabulous!

      And there’s something about taking off for 17 days — that’s how long my Emily was gone, too. Cats!!

  7. Patty October 7, 2016 / 11:56 am

    These are not creepy clowns. I would not run from them.

    We have had creepy clown sightings in town. One holding a knife standing at the intersection of 2 busy streets late at night, tapping on a car window while the light was red. 2 clowns sighted in a particular neighborhood, allegedly one with a gun, one with a knife. Later that night, a shooting in that neighborhood, guy sitting on a porch says a man walked up and started shooting, he shot back. Man on porch with a non life threatening wound in his chest. None of the news sites mention a clown costume, but commenters claim there was one. There are no clown costumes for sale in any of the stores, they were all pulled because of the clowns seen all over town, including one at the middle school football game. I’m sure it’s just people thinking it’s a harmless prank, but it’s all fun and games until some clown gets shot.

    • Murray C. October 7, 2016 / 12:36 pm

      That is so weird – what is the matter with people. It’s just thoughtlessness for the most part with some additional real creeps muddying the waters. It sets everyone on edge. I know of no signs of this in our neck of the woods and I hope it remains that way, tho’ with Halloween coming around who knows.

    • 6rabbits October 7, 2016 / 8:41 pm

      Two school systems in my area had threats made against them on social media. Some Clown group threatening to kidnap students or knife teachers on the way to their cars. Deemed non-credible by officials, but some parents still kept kids home! I hadn’t even heard of these marauding attack clowns, but apparently it’s the newest thing? Color me nonplussed.😬

  8. Julie October 7, 2016 / 6:04 pm

    Mike – I feel like this could only come from your Beautiful Mind.

  9. Kar October 7, 2016 / 10:59 pm

    Is this an annual thing?

    Seem to remember this from a few years ago around Halloween. Creepy clowns with knives who favor the train stations.

  10. Laura October 7, 2016 / 11:45 pm

    I have only one thing to say about these canine clowns — to Ramblin’ Jack. Jack, dude, what a long, strange trip it’s been!**

    **First thing said to me by an old college buddy named, coincidentally, Jack when I talked to him for the first time in 30 years. And for both of us, yes, it had been a long, strange trip!

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