Cutting Remarks

“So, you say your samurai sword is the fastest in the world? Alas, your blade is no match for me — Ninja Cat! The cat so fast, you cannot even see me! Whoosh — I am here! Whoosh — now I am there! Whoosh — faster than the eye can see! So flail about with your pathetic sword, old man, but you are powerless to defend yourself against the swift punishment that awaits you when you… least expect… it…”

Um, does anybody have a box of Band-Aids?

What a cut-up, Sharon H.

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17 thoughts on “Cutting Remarks

  1. Elizabeth March 16, 2017 / 10:07 am

    I want to snuggle this kitty, to make up for the people who did this. Something tells me, though, that kitty might not be so trusting post-haircut.

    If this were a cute or sad, I would vote sad.

    • allein ? March 16, 2017 / 10:23 am

      Me too. He definitely does not look happy. The hoomins should probably keep an eye on their shoes.

    • Max's Mom March 16, 2017 / 11:13 am

      I’m with you, Elizabeth. It’s not done for the benefit of the cat, and, I wonder how the cat feels about grooming something so foreign to its nature.
      Mike’s narrative is great, though. Who but Mike would think of that backstory!

  2. dubravkamcvmd March 16, 2017 / 10:16 am

    The kitteh looks healthy but I would think having its coat in that condition would be very upsetting. Looking at its surroundings, maybe this is a pet store? Unpleasant I think all around.

    • kodalai March 16, 2017 / 10:40 am

      Could also be a vet, or a shelter, or a groomer.* Not enough context to say.

      *It could also be more than one, since some groomers operate out of pet stores!

  3. Doug March 16, 2017 / 10:16 am

    WHAT .. THE .. FUR ???

    That a fur cut, skin folds, or both .. wow ..

  4. Gigi the cat lady March 16, 2017 / 10:25 am

    I just want to know how they got the cat to sit still for this?!!
    I have to shave my long hair cat every Spring because hates to be brushed so he matts horribly and I always have to do it in stages because he won’t let me do it all in one sitting!

  5. AB March 16, 2017 / 11:06 am

    We gave all our kitties haircuts one summer to help them stay cool. It was truly, excruciatingly hot, and we just couldn’t afford a lot of AC. All the cats HATED the process except our yellow tomcat. He purred the whole time and tried to nuzzle the razor. I think he could get a haircut every week and be happy. So, I am hoping ninja cat has the same attitude (in the spirit of giving the benefit of the doubt).

    • Julie March 16, 2017 / 11:58 am

      I follow a Maine Coon on Instagram and his owner also gives the cat a buzz cut every summer. It’s hilarious to see b/c they obviously don’t shave the face (and for some reason leave the tip of the tail furry) but everything else is shaved. I don’t know why they do it (her posts are mostly in Latvian), but I don’t think she would do it unless it benefits the cat.

  6. Julie March 16, 2017 / 11:52 am

    I’m not a fan of this hair cut, primarily for aesthetic reasons. It is definitely NOT slimming, and in fact makes her butt/hips look bigger. Also, going against the natural color line of the fur makes the cut feel even more unflattering – almost jarring to the eye.

    • Emsthemonster March 16, 2017 / 12:36 pm

      Oh this is why she has a worried look on her precious face. “Do I look fat in this fur coat?”

      On a more serious note, I wish I could buy her so that noone could ever do this to her again. She is beautiful even without the fancy grooming.

  7. EAG46 March 16, 2017 / 12:07 pm

    I can understand trimming a Maine Coon or a Persian cat’s fur for the summer, or another long-haired cat’s fur around the butt if they have hygiene issues, but this is horrible. That poor cat. Its owner’s shoes are doomed.

    • Carlotta March 16, 2017 / 7:03 pm

      I wouldn’t dream of doing this, but I still check my shoes for cat toys and other cat by-products!

  8. diane in los angeles March 16, 2017 / 12:49 pm

    This seems to have been done solely for aesthetic reasons. I have friends who do cooling cuts on long haired cats in the summertime, but those cuts are clearly for a purpose. Doing this just for human fancy deserves some good claw-on-human-skin action.

  9. Rachel March 16, 2017 / 4:05 pm

    I don’t like stupid haircuts on dogs – this is worse. Poor kitteh. Luckily kittehs come with natural weaponry to use against whoever did this.

  10. Ricky's Mom March 16, 2017 / 7:48 pm

    I echo what Rachel said. I voted this down because that haircut is appalling and totally unnecessary, although I will say kitty seems to be otherwise well-cared for. It really is Not Cute in my estimation.

    That said, if I could I would add a thumbs-up for Mike’s clever commentary.

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