Madame Zorina Sees Your Future!

“I see intrigue and romance in the days ahead. You will meet a man with one blonde eyebrow who will become obsessed with you. He will offer you a suitcase full of pastry dough, which you must not accept, as it is not his to give. This will only infatuate him further and he will invite you on a sea voyage, which will turn out to mean the swan paddle boats down at the park. It will be dutch treat.”

“Oh, and bring pepper spray.”

Sounds legit, Sharon H.

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54 thoughts on “Madame Zorina Sees Your Future!

  1. Ricky's Mom July 25, 2017 / 8:08 am

    And at that, it’s better than some blind dates I’ve had.

    • Emsthemonster July 25, 2017 / 9:07 am

      πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚ I can relate to that πŸ™‚

    • Clairdelune July 25, 2017 / 10:07 am

      Oh my yes!! Gave up long time ago… πŸ™

    • debg July 25, 2017 / 10:55 am

      Hell, it’s better than some NOT-blind dates I’ve had.

      • Smartypants July 25, 2017 / 12:28 pm

        Yeah…when the waiter was afraid of him, I knew we were in trouble…

        • Ricky's Mom July 25, 2017 / 4:38 pm

          Good grief, Smartypants! That sounds truly terrible. Mine were awful, but at least they were funny after the fact.

          • Smartypants July 26, 2017 / 7:23 am

            Thankfully it made enough of an impression on me that I broke up with him. I owe that waiter! Now I’m happily single for life πŸ˜€

  2. fkaWaldenPond July 25, 2017 / 8:10 am

    Morning All! I am off to Newfoundland for the next few days; my brother has a summer home about an hour and half drive north of St. Johns. The whales are there feeding on the caplein and the roses are in bloom– I will try and get some video of the whales! Be well, back soon!

    • Laura July 25, 2017 / 8:17 am

      Have a wonderful time in Newfoundland! I’ve heard it’s just lovely, and a great place to whale-watch, so I hope you’ll see lots and lots of them!

      This is either an oddly-constructed kitty or it’s doing something really, really weird with its ears. In either case, I suspect the pepper spray advice is a good idea! πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

      • Laura July 25, 2017 / 8:55 am

        Or is it a Pallas cat? That might be why its ears are so odd. I’m particularly clueless this morning….

        • debg July 25, 2017 / 10:56 am

          I thought Pallas Cat too.

    • dubravkamcvmd July 25, 2017 / 8:34 am

      Sounds wonderful! Enjoy!

    • Gigi the cat lady July 25, 2017 / 8:53 am

      Have a great vacation and if it’s your first time in Newfoundland don’t forget that you have to kiss the cod and drink the Screech.

    • Emsthemonster July 25, 2017 / 9:08 am

      Have a nice vacation!

    • Murray C July 25, 2017 / 3:11 pm

      Ah, I can hear Katherine Hepburn saying that last sentence – have a fabulous time!

    • Dulcie July 25, 2017 / 4:20 pm

      My Newfoundland joke…
      A man was heard on the phone telling his friend in the south about his winter day in Newfoundland. He said “my god man its pretty cold and the wind us howlin’ somethin fierce. The snow is prit near up to the roof and still comin’ down. Don’t dare go out. My wife just looks through the window with a sad woe begone look on her face. And I tell ya if it gets any colder I’m gonna have to let her in”.

    • Ricky's Mom July 25, 2017 / 4:40 pm

      Enjoy your holiday! I’ve never been to Newfoundland, but I was researching local dialects recently, and it looked lovely.

  3. michael July 25, 2017 / 8:19 am

    Ah, yes. Madame Zornia tells the story of my life.

  4. Blue Footed Booby July 25, 2017 / 8:34 am

    Every time I see pallas cats, I hear this music in my head:




    • Gigi the cat lady July 25, 2017 / 8:59 am

      Do you know what language the song is in? It sounds a lot like the language of the Inuit, the native people of the Canadian Arctic.

      • Laura July 25, 2017 / 9:04 am

        It sounds in places like it’s Mongolian throat singing, where he’s singing the note and the overtone at the same time. It’s truly amazing!

        • Blue Footed Booby July 25, 2017 / 9:29 am

          Yeah, I think it’s likely Mongolian, and if not it’s one of those weird regional languages no english speakers can remember the names of.

          The Cyrillic comments on the video are Russian, according to Google, and for whatever that’s worth.

        • Emsthemonster July 25, 2017 / 9:48 am

          The first two words from the Russian title are “Pallas cat”, but that’s where my knowledge ends πŸ™‚

          • Ricky's Mom July 25, 2017 / 11:11 am

            The description reads (more or less): “In the Daursky Reserve, research is conducted using radio collars, the data from which help to learn more about the life of mysterious cats.”

            Which is very cool (but tells us nothing about the music).

        • Ricky's Mom July 25, 2017 / 10:51 am

          It’s definitely throat singing (polyphonic overtone singing), and my guess is that it’s Asian; possibly KhΓΆΓΆmii, but it could be another strain such as Tuvan. Throat-singing is also part of Inuit culture, and Xhosa culture, and each variety is different, although the use of overtones relates them to each other. There are some European musical genres that use overtone singing as well. It’s fascinating stuff.

          Here’s a nifty video from someone who learned it outside her own culture. https://youtu.be/vC9Qh709gas

      • 6rabbits July 25, 2017 / 10:37 am

        I’m really curious for a translation!

  5. allein ? July 25, 2017 / 8:39 am

    I wanna know whose pastry dough it is…

    • Muppet2171 July 25, 2017 / 8:59 am

      Mine! I’ve been making cookies. If you do accept it, bake at 375 for 8-10 minutes. ?

      • allein ? July 25, 2017 / 9:10 am

        In that case…

  6. Emsthemonster July 25, 2017 / 9:06 am

    Earlier I had a suitor who offered to take me on a sea voyage. As I wasn’t sure he also meant a voyage back I preferred to stay at home πŸ™‚
    Well it would have been a hell of a voyage, I get seasick even at the sight of ships parking at the dock, really romantic.
    Interestingly enough I have no problem on planes, which I dont understand: While I am not a good swimmer, I cannot fly any better either.

    • allein ? July 25, 2017 / 9:09 am

      I can’t handle boats. I’m okay on planes but I’ve never flown without dramamine, so I don’t know how that would go. If I’m going to be a passenger in a car/bus for an hour or more I’ll take dramamine. Trains, however, don’t generally bother me at all (unless I’m already not feeling well).

      • Blue Footed Booby July 25, 2017 / 9:37 am

        I get air/carsick if I try to read, watch or movie, or basically do anything besides stare straight ahead. But I’ve never had a problem on boats.

        I’ve found ginger or ginger extract or whatever they are pills do a decent job preventing motion sickness, and don’t have the side effects of dramamine.

        • allein ? July 25, 2017 / 10:02 am

          Even with dramamine, I won’t try to read in a car. I was able to read on a plane (with drugs), and I can read on a train even without it. Dramamine makes a “natural” formula which is basically a high dose of ginger but I’ve never tried it. I usually get the 24-hour, “less drowsy” formula and I don’t have a problem, but a few years ago I couldn’t find it and took the regular stuff for the first time in years, and it totally knocked me out. I spent the ride half asleep and barely able to lift the piece of paper with the directions to where we were going because my arms felt so heavy. I never had that reaction when I took it as a kid.

          Though a few years ago I got the opportunity to test the 24-hour claim on a day-trip to DC; it only lasted about 20. I took it at 6am when I left my house, and then on the way home that night I fell asleep in the car and woke up around 2:30am and I could tell it was wearing off. We wouldn’t get back to my friend’s house until 4, so we stopped at a rest stop and I took some more. One reason I sometimes like to drive on long trips is because I don’t get sick.

          • Ricky's Mom July 25, 2017 / 10:38 am

            I’m member of the seasick crew. I’ve gotten sick on the Staten Island ferry, even with sea bands (which do help me in cars and on buses, and during turbulence on planes).

            Trains I love. I can read on a train.

            • allein ? July 25, 2017 / 11:10 am

              I used to commute to Philly on the train; it was about half an hour each way. I actually enjoyed it. I only had to drive 10 minutes to the train station, and then I got to relax and read until I got to the city (then it was only 6 blocks to my office). When I used to go to NYC once a week or so for work, the train ride was my favorite part (as long as it wasn’t too crowded…the day we rode halfway home standing at the end of the car was not fun).

              • Ricky's Mom July 25, 2017 / 4:42 pm

                The subway at rush hour can be hard to deal with, but I still think it’s a miracle. It’s also a big part of the reason I cannot drive.

                • allein ? July 25, 2017 / 4:50 pm

                  The Philly subway wasn’t too bad, but I only took it for four blocks (30th – 34th St and then I walked to 36th) and only if the weather was bad. If it was nice enough out I just walked the 6 blocks. I never took the subway when I had to go to NY for work; I liked the walk (from Penn Station to 5th Ave and between 17th-18th Street). I’ve only taken it a few times with other people who knew where they were going, and never at rush hour. NYC subway scares me.

                  If I lived in a city with mass transit like that I would not have a car.

                  • Juno July 26, 2017 / 10:57 am

                    Allein, I lived in Philly for 14 years and never had a car. I could drive, but didn’t want the expense and hassle. I too enjoyed being able to read, etc., while commuting. I could get anywhere I needed to go in the city. Of course, there was a lot of walking involved, too–and I was in much better shape then thanks to that. When I needed to get someplace in the suburbs, though . . . yikes. I always said I felt about going to the suburbs the way people who live in the suburbs feel about going into the city. “NOOOOOoooooo!” Buses and trains that run EVERY THREE HOURS??! (And less or not at all overnight and weekends!) What a nightmare.

                    I got a car just a few days before I left Philly, and it was almost like moving to a new city. Suddenly it mattered which way one-way streets ran. Going back to driving took a little adjusting–things like remembering I had to keep an eye on the gas gauge. I’d get a journal and think, “Great, I’ll read that on the way to work tomorrow”–uh, no. And my nails don’t look nearly as nice, now that I can’t file and buff them every day as I go to work.

                    • allein ? July 26, 2017 / 11:04 am

                      Yeah, I was in better shape back then, too. :-/

                • dubravkamcvmd July 25, 2017 / 5:15 pm

                  Hah! I think only lifelong New Yorkers understand being an adult and not being able to drive. I got a license when I was 33 because I was tired of being stuck wherever the plane dropped me when I went on vacation. I did drive several times on vacations but trying to drive in Manhattan cured me. I haven’t driven in probably 30 years. A driver’s license is good ID though.

                  • Ricky's Mom July 25, 2017 / 6:31 pm

                    I learned to drive in my 30s for the same reason, but I needed brush-up lessons every time I took a vacation, which was very seldom. Finally I just couldn’t make it work any more. I take trains, buses, or taxis when out of town and consider it money well spentβ€”even the cabs.

                    I renew my license for ID purposes only. And come to think of it, I can’t remember my last vacation.

                    • dubravkamcvmd July 26, 2017 / 3:30 pm

                      Double Hah! Could learning to drive only when you’re older so that you can get around when you’re Outside New York be a NYC folkway that we don’t realize is a folkway? I’ll bet we have a lot of folkways we don’t realize are folkways. I would love an anthropologist from America to come and observe us and point them out.

          • Murray C July 25, 2017 / 10:22 pm

            I take Dramamine in either 1/4 segments (every hour) or 1/2 segments (every two hours) and the drowsiness factor is much less. The Less Drowsy kind do little for me and I’m afraid to try the other methods in case they don’t work. I was on a Red Eye last week and I took a whole one so I could sleep.

      • Gigi the cat lady July 25, 2017 / 11:06 am

        I have no problem in planes or cars or boats, the only time I felt a little nauseous was went I filmed with the old kind of video camera while my husband drove down Lombard Street in San Francisco.

    • Juno July 25, 2017 / 10:16 am

      The “suitor who offered to take [you] on a sea voyage” reminds me of my favorite scene in “Shirley Valentine.” (NSFW)




      • Emsthemonster July 25, 2017 / 11:56 am

        Hahaha thanks a lot, I haven’t seen this before!
        The guy in the movie is totally like my regular suitors πŸ™‚ except mine are usually age 60+, slightly lack in the teeth department and get the main calorie intake from alcoholic drinks.

      • Nancy July 25, 2017 / 12:07 pm

        One of my all-time favorite movies!! I keep a silk kimono for travel, totally inspired by the end of this picture. Thanks for the excerpt, totally right on for this post!!

    • Murray C July 25, 2017 / 3:19 pm

      Me, TOO! Allein. I would’ve turned him down as well. Hi, Emsthemonster, haven’t heard from you since I got back, I don’t think! I had a great time but none of it involved water except for a swim. And none of it involved a psychic cat that looks a bit monkeyish, at least in that picture!

      How is everybody, by the way – Jan, you must be close to having knees done? Birdcage, where are you???? I remember various people had various issues they were dealing with so I hope everything goes well with you all.

      • Emsthemonster July 25, 2017 / 3:34 pm

        Welcome back, Murray! We missed you.
        I am glad you had a great time. I had some rough past weeks, but our fellow Cutetropolitans did a great job at comforting me and now problems are back to the manageable level, so I am OK now πŸ™‚

        • Murray C July 26, 2017 / 9:11 pm

          I’m very happy to hear that, Ems (do you mind if I call you “Ems”??) This is a terrific group, isn’t it?! I wonder if Mike knew what he was bargaining for when he started it all!

  7. Doug July 25, 2017 / 10:15 am

    Paddle Boat ? Yikes

    • Murray C July 25, 2017 / 3:19 pm

      LOVE this. I play banjo.

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