This Is Stuff You Won’t Learn at the Smithsonian, People

Did today’s capybara evolve from a prehistoric beast of burden? That’s the theory explored in “Taming the Mighty Hamster Dog,” the latest exhibit at the Museum of Irresponsible History. After learning how to subdue the hamster dog with the Vulcan nose pick,ย our ancient ancestors used the enormous animalsย to build the pyramids, Stonehenge, Atlantis, and landing sites for our alien overlords.


From “Why Do Animals Like Capybaras So Much?” on Bored Panda, submitted by Andrew Y.

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84 thoughts on “This Is Stuff You Won’t Learn at the Smithsonian, People

  1. allein April 8, 2016 / 1:38 pm

    Museum of Irresponsible History

    Oh, how I wish this was a real place.

    • Haha April 8, 2016 / 2:02 pm

      I would go out of my way to visit! ๐Ÿ™‚

      • allein April 8, 2016 / 3:32 pm

        Road trip!

    • Mal April 8, 2016 / 2:37 pm

      Pretty sure I work there.

      • allein April 8, 2016 / 3:34 pm


      • Lurkingduck April 8, 2016 / 7:18 pm

        Pretty sure I’m one of the displays…

        • Clairdelune April 9, 2016 / 7:22 pm

          Are you the prehistoric giant duck?!?!?

          • allein April 9, 2016 / 8:07 pm

            You mean the quacken?

            • Lurkingduck April 10, 2016 / 11:29 am

              Laughed so hard I cried. Thanks, I needed that.

              • allein April 10, 2016 / 11:55 am

                I can’t take all the credit; someone posted it the other day. Can’t remember where, exactly. Glad it made you laugh! ๐Ÿ˜Š

  2. Kar April 8, 2016 / 1:48 pm

    Did the Discovery Channel sponsor this? Next they’ll tell us that capybaras spring mermaid tails when they go into salt water.

    That pic with the guinea pigs cracked me up. You know that they’re whispering to each other, Steroids

    • Julie April 8, 2016 / 2:11 pm



      THANK YOU!!!!!

    • Amy April 8, 2016 / 2:49 pm

      I bet they’re all like “He was adopted.”

    • Lurkingduck April 8, 2016 / 4:47 pm

      Miss Guinea Pig resents the insinuation that she has been using steroids. She wishes to point out that, not too many posts ago, you were all rejoicing over the term “furry wide-load”. Is this term applicable only to cats? Or are other animals permitted to take comfort in rotundity and depth?

      • Clairdelune April 8, 2016 / 5:55 pm

        Oh, I know lots of animals – including some human ones – who take comfort in rotundity and depth, two attributes to be admired. I am proud to say I have reached a certain degree of rotundity and depth, and take much comfort in it. ๐Ÿ˜€

      • Kar April 8, 2016 / 7:40 pm

        You know that no one but the East German Judge is buying that right?

    • SAA1451 April 9, 2016 / 5:01 am

      I had guinea pigs as a child and loved them. The thought of having a super-sized piggy is just mind boggling.

      I love how regal capybara’s always look no matter what is going on around them. How many other animals could manage that air of superiority while half a dozen other animals were taking a snooze on their back and head?

      • Faye April 9, 2016 / 7:56 pm

        SAA1451: I also remember my childhood G peegs and all the funny sounds they made. Sweet creatures.

        Does anyone know if Capybaras make peeg type noises?

        • Lurkingduck April 10, 2016 / 11:53 am
          • allein April 10, 2016 / 12:00 pm

            They sound kinda like tribbles..

          • Faye April 10, 2016 / 12:03 pm

            Oh wow Lurkingduck that video answered my question. I liked their vocalizing. Close to gpeeegs. Only adds to their charm imho.

            • Murray April 10, 2016 / 12:09 pm

              I love their chirpy purr! And the close-up of their teeth was fabulous. Thanks.

  3. Catwhisperer April 8, 2016 / 1:51 pm

    My favorite was #10.

    Do you think if we all pooled our resources, we could create our own sanctuary for magical creatures? We could call it NTMTOM’s ark, and have 2 capybaras, 2 wombats, 2 penguins, oh–and 2 red pandas, two fennec foxes…

    • Julie April 8, 2016 / 2:13 pm

      Don’t you mean:

      2 Hamster Dogs

      2 Flat Nosed Pigs

      2 Tuxedo Birds

      2 Raccoon Bears

      2 Elephant Dogs


    • SAA1451 April 9, 2016 / 5:02 am

      You forgot Quokkas!

      Any list that includes Capybaras and Wombats should be Required to include Quokkas.

  4. Raymond April 8, 2016 / 2:01 pm

    Alternative theory: Did today’s humans descend from rodent-worshiping primates?

    In this artist’s conception, we see early proto-humans attempting to serve every need of the capybara-like animal, by grooming it, dancing for it, and bowing down to it. In return, the rodent offers its wisdom to the priest who reaches out for the mighty face. We can only imagine the sense of peace that must have imbued the priest.

    And come back next month for our exhibit on Lemurs: The Missing Link Between Squirrel and Human.

    • Julie April 8, 2016 / 2:13 pm

      HA HA HA!!!!

    • Clairdelune April 8, 2016 / 6:06 pm

      Brilliant, Raymond!! I read how the Egyptian Sphynx originally portrayed a capybara, until a jealous Faraoh had the face changed so it would look like him. That’s why monkeys, remembering the ancient protohumans, defecate on the sphynx whenever they can, between busloads of tourists.

      • Lurkingduck April 8, 2016 / 7:13 pm

        What?!?! Link? Lol

  5. Gigi_the cat lady April 8, 2016 / 2:14 pm

    LOL!! And of course this guy as to be the curator of the Museum of Irresponsible History.
    If you don’t know him he is in this show called Ancient Aliens that is a riot to watch, basically everything is because of aliens. It’s hysterical.

        • allein April 8, 2016 / 3:41 pm

            • allein April 8, 2016 / 3:50 pm

              I love that picture. At another blog I comment on, whenever someone posts the aliens guy, I post the aliens kitty. ๐Ÿ˜›

          • Gigi_the cat lady April 8, 2016 / 4:43 pm

            It was a Awiens and him was this big! ๐Ÿ˜บ๐Ÿ˜บ๐Ÿ˜บ๐Ÿ˜บ๐Ÿ˜บ

          • Starfish April 8, 2016 / 4:45 pm

            Holy cow, that’s the best thing I’ve seen today.

            • allein April 8, 2016 / 4:46 pm

              Yay! ๐Ÿ™‚

          • fkaWaldenPond April 8, 2016 / 7:29 pm

            Thank you for this Allein! Tomorrow morning upon waking I am going to try and recreate this look; oh heck, it’s Friday night– maybe I will be able to achieve it before bed!!! #aspirations #achievable goals #let’s do this!

            • allein April 8, 2016 / 7:39 pm

              I love the look on the other kitty’s face. You know he started backing away slowly just after this picture was taken. ๐Ÿ‘€

              • fkaWaldenPond April 8, 2016 / 7:55 pm

                Or kitty vigorously started whaapping the alien… ๐Ÿ™‚

                • allein April 8, 2016 / 7:59 pm


          • Lurkingduck April 9, 2016 / 12:20 am

            Is there a copy of this pic without words? I want to see rest of kitten!

            • allein April 9, 2016 / 12:29 am

              I found this one…no words, but they have mustaches. ๐Ÿ˜›

              And I found this while I was looking.

  6. Julie April 8, 2016 / 2:16 pm

    I think this is the only place on the Internet where the comments to posts are actually worth reading.

    You people ROCK!!!

    • Starfish April 8, 2016 / 3:04 pm

      A title inherited from good old CO.

    • belphebe April 8, 2016 / 5:58 pm

      I’ve found a couple other blogs that have great comment threads, but they are certainly few and far between.

      Still giggling over “hamster dog” and “tuxedo bird”.

  7. murkle46 April 8, 2016 / 3:17 pm

  8. Faye April 8, 2016 / 3:20 pm

    Hmmm my theory is that Capybaras came to Earth from a cold planet so their body temperature is higher than usual mammal temps on Earth. The warmth is attractive to all Earth dwellers including humans.

    Also, they give off SNOOZE GAS. Once you get close to the warm the SNOOZE GAS makes you too drowsy to get away. All you are capable of at that point is Cappy grooming. Which sounds like a good deal to me.

    • Gigi_the cat lady April 8, 2016 / 4:48 pm

      Yeah!!! Look at all those hamster dogs keeping dry, thanks A J

    • Clairdelune April 8, 2016 / 6:15 pm

      They may be the secret rulers of Japan – after all, the shelter was built just for them because the sign says “CAPYBARA” . Who knows what secrets are hidden in the mysterious East??? Could it be the CAPYBARAS are the aliens running things?!?!?

  9. Ms Can Opener April 8, 2016 / 3:57 pm

    You all are ignoring the elephant in the room. OMG, the dreaded Vulcan Nose Pick. Will I ever again have a sound night of sleep? I think not.

    • Faye April 8, 2016 / 4:43 pm

      Pointy Pink Chicken Syndrome. So sorry. ๐Ÿ˜ท

  10. Murray Callahan April 8, 2016 / 5:30 pm

    Everybody’s a comic! And I thank you. (I don’t know how to do emojis on my regular computer! There’s no emoji button!)

    • Smartypants April 8, 2016 / 6:18 pm

      Murray, here are the only two I know, on my regular keyboard:

      Smile: Colon, hyphen, close parenthesis: ๐Ÿ™‚

      Big smile: Colon, hyphen, upper-case D: ๐Ÿ˜€

    • Gigi_the cat lady April 8, 2016 / 6:34 pm

      On my Mac I just go to Edit and click on Emoji & Symbols and a window opens with a lot of emoji and you just have to click on the one you want to post.

        • allein April 8, 2016 / 7:12 pm

          another test
          ๐Ÿต ๐Ÿ™ˆ ๐Ÿ™‰ ๐Ÿ™Š

          Edit: Those came from here and it has a ton!

          ๐Ÿ’ ๐ŸŒบ ๐ŸŒป ๐Ÿฐ ๐Ÿป ๐Ÿผ ๐Ÿจ ๐Ÿฏ

      • Smartypants April 8, 2016 / 8:04 pm

        Awesome, Gigi and Allein – I’ll try them out!

        • allein April 8, 2016 / 8:11 pm

          That second one is a bit of a surprise; you can’t see what they really look like until you post!

          And now I’m trying as many as I can. ๐Ÿธ ๐Ÿ™

      • Murray Callahan April 8, 2016 / 8:48 pm

        Fabulous, I found them I thought I’d seen them in my meanderings on the computer (I have an iMac) but I could never remember where. I thank you all for responding to my pathetic plea. I’m learning a lot from all these posts. Some I don’t get at all – references to movies and TV shows are all but lost on me – I have a different area of geekhood. ๐Ÿ–Œ๐ŸŽจ๐ŸŽค๐ŸŒธ๐ŸŽ„and๐Ÿฐ!

        • allein April 8, 2016 / 8:55 pm

          Yay! You deserve some dessert! ๐Ÿฆ ๐Ÿฐ

          • Murray Callahan April 8, 2016 / 9:00 pm

            Thank you. Don’t mind if I do! (wanders off to rummage in the kitchen)

            • Faye April 8, 2016 / 9:57 pm

              ๐Ÿ๐ŸŽ๐Ÿ๐ŸŠ๐Ÿ‹๐ŸŒ๐Ÿ‰๐Ÿ‡๐Ÿ“๐Ÿ’๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ๐Ÿ…๐Ÿ†๐ŸŒฝ Eat healthy.

              • allein April 8, 2016 / 9:59 pm


                ๐Ÿš ๐Ÿ” ๐ŸŸ ๐Ÿ• ๐Ÿ ๐Ÿก ๐Ÿง ๐Ÿจ ๐Ÿฆ ๐Ÿฐ ๐ŸŽ‚ ๐Ÿฎ ๐Ÿฌ ๐Ÿญ ๐Ÿซ ๐Ÿฉ ๐Ÿช ๐Ÿธ

                • Lurkingduck April 9, 2016 / 12:22 am

                  Mike, are we going to start throwing food here, too?

                  • allein April 9, 2016 / 12:30 am

                    FOOD FIGHT!!!!

                    (And I just got told I was posting too quickly and to slow down…that’s a new one.)

                    • Smartypants April 9, 2016 / 6:49 am

                      Pfft – tell ’em it’s called a conversation ๐Ÿ˜€

                • Murray April 9, 2016 / 10:06 am

                  Balance in all things.๐Ÿ ๐Ÿ™๐Ÿ˜ ( what ARE those three things???)

                  • allein April 9, 2016 / 10:34 am

                    ‘K, I did a little googling, cuz it was bugging me. These things usually look quite different in my email (and even in my email, they look different on my computer than on my tablet), and usually more identifiable there, but these were stumping me.

                    I think the first one is a sweet potato cut in half (my first guess was ham, but ham’s not yellow..).

                    The other two are apparently rice (the black square is seaweed, I guess):

                    • Murray April 9, 2016 / 12:28 pm

                      Whew, I can sleep easy. Who ever came up with the idea for a half a sweet potato emoji? I wish I’d been a fly on the wall during that meeting.

                    • allein April 9, 2016 / 12:30 pm

                      lol…they’ve got some odd ones.

        • Clairdelune April 9, 2016 / 7:35 pm

          Bunnies?!? You raise bunnies?!?!? Then surely you have some CUTE photos worthy of this blog. ๐Ÿ˜€

          • Murray April 9, 2016 / 11:21 pm

            I don’t raise bunnies, I have two and I work with a bunny rescue, tho’ in a less active way these days. After fostering two for a year my hubby said no more, we were adding to the compost pile at a rate we couldn’t keep up with! ๐Ÿ˜œ
            When I figure out how to post I will do so with some of my photos.

  11. Faye April 9, 2016 / 11:15 am

    Hey don’t forget ๐Ÿน๐Ÿธ๐Ÿท๐Ÿป๐Ÿบ๐Ÿพ๐Ÿถ
    Next day gonna need ๐Ÿšฝ๐Ÿšฟ

    • allein April 9, 2016 / 11:19 am

      Speaking of showers and rice, I should probably go do the former because I’m meeting my best friend for a Chinese food lunch with her family for the three birthdays they’ve got coming up in the next week. Just waiting for her to tell me what time.


      Edit: she texted just as I posted this and picked up my phone to check that she didn’t send me a message while I was in the other room. ๐Ÿ˜›

    • Murray April 9, 2016 / 12:32 pm

      HAH! No, wouldn’t dream of forgetting those but I don’t think the other two need be employed beyond their typical use. I tend toward sensible. ๐Ÿค

      • Faye April 9, 2016 / 8:04 pm


  12. 6rabbits April 11, 2016 / 1:32 am

    Drawback with capybaras–they must poop in water, like in a couple feet! I would not want to clean that pool! Just fine visiting with them, tho.๐Ÿ˜‰

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