That Elf is so Shelfish

Oh, sure — The Elf on the Shelf sells like hotcakes every year, but when I try to make The Cat on the Shelf a thing? Nobody even notices! This is just another example of how Big Elf and their anti-cat agenda are holding me back!

If I only had a tall striped hat. That cat seemed to do rather well.

Get a load of Mr. High and Mighty, Andrew Y. (via Imgur.)

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18 thoughts on “That Elf is so Shelfish

  1. Ricky's Mom December 8, 2017 / 11:43 am

    I would MUCH rather have a cat on a shelf than that elf thingy.

    • allein 🐾 December 8, 2017 / 11:46 am

      The elf creeps me out.

      One of my friends realized recently that her nephew is turning 4 soon and “doesn’t have an elf on the shelf.” She posted this thought on facebook and included the hashtag “#benicetoyourlittlesister.” Her brother’s comment did not seem amused. πŸ˜‰

      • Duckie πŸ₯ December 8, 2017 / 12:03 pm

        Agree with the creeping out. Santa may be a CIA spy, but elf is a pervert.

      • Gigi The cat lady December 8, 2017 / 12:40 pm

        Yes the whole elf is watching seems very creepy and scary to me. Like I said last Christmas I much prefer the way people around here do it, the elf plays tricks every night before Christmas, like hiding socks in the fridge or putting cereal in their coat pockets, piling couch cushions on the kitchen table, stuff like that So when they wake up they go through the house to see what mischief the elf got up to.

        • allein 🐾 December 8, 2017 / 12:57 pm

          Yeah, the tricks are cute and I’ve seen some really funny ones online (mostly not kid-friendly πŸ˜‰ ) but the “reporting back to Santa each night” and “you can’t touch it or you’ll kill the magic” bits bother me. My friend just moved back into her house a couple weeks ago after having it raised and they had their elf, Isobel, sitting on the back of the couch waiting for the kids. She had to move her so the kids wouldn’t risk accidentally touching her.

          • Emsthemonster December 8, 2017 / 1:07 pm

            Oh so it is Santa’s local spy.
            Oh my, Santa must have some tough nights, I mean what could such an elf (let alone thousands of them) report: Lil’ Joe picked his nose again and the reindeers shake their antlers with disbelief.

            • allein 🐾 December 8, 2017 / 1:09 pm

              “Oh so it is Santa’s local spy.”

              Exactly! And he’s often pretty naughty, himself, actually. Creepy little hypocrite. πŸ˜›

              • Emsthemonster December 8, 2017 / 1:25 pm

                Well it is important to teach the core values to children at a young age:

                spy on others and report behind their backs, it makes you “untouchable” – some of my co-workers obviously grew up with an elf.

                As for the hypocrisy part, the elves should have their own metaelves to report on them, but maybe those reports would make poor Santa pass out.

      • Emsthemonster December 8, 2017 / 12:49 pm

        I have asked my friend Google as I don’t understand what you guys are talking about. But I’m still clueless. All I found was pictures of a moderately ugly toy (= boy in clothes must probably stolen from Santa) So is it a common toy for today’s kids?
        What is so creepy about it?

        • allein 🐾 December 8, 2017 / 1:02 pm

          Part of the story behind it is that the elf watches the kids all day and reports back to Santa after they go to bed, then returns in the morning and moves to a different spot in the house; also parents often have the elf doing something funny or silly to amuse the kids (part of the game is finding the elf in the morning to see what he’s gotten up to). The other thing is that the kids aren’t allowed to touch the elf or it will kill the magic. I’ve seen a few stories online about kids accidentally touching their elf and then getting all upset (whether they were truly upset or the parents were exaggerating for the sake of a better story, I don’t know). (One of my friends did it with her son a few years ago, and the next year she asked if he remembered Stanley, and he said “yeah, but he’s not real.” She was very excited to not have to come up with things to do with it every day. I don’t think she’s done it for her daughter (who was too young the first time around).)

          If you google elf on the shelf memes you’ll find all kinds of funny and sometimes depraved things people have done with the elf (passed out drinking with Barbie, “pooping” Hershey kisses, things like that).

        • Wuyizidi December 8, 2017 / 1:06 pm

          As a parent you put this thing on the shelf before the holidays, and tell your children the elf will report their naughty/nice behavior to Santa every night. As a part of that story you the parent have to move the elf every night to a new observation post.

          When it comes to being silently judged in my own home, I’d much prefer that of my cat πŸ™‚

        • Emsthemonster December 8, 2017 / 1:14 pm

          Thank you for the explanation, Allein and Wuyizidi.

          The “no touchie the elfie” part seems so impossible. Or maybe other kids behave better than I did with my brother. In our room there were constant pillow fights, deliberately or not, the elf would have also got what he deserved for spying πŸ™‚

          • allein 🐾 December 8, 2017 / 1:19 pm

            I think the goal is to find places that are out of reach.

  2. Doug December 8, 2017 / 12:24 pm

    That’s not a cat people .. That’s Meowth or Persian .. Thinking the later, as the coloring is closer. I mean come on .. the shelf’s are full of Pokemon

  3. Muppet2171 December 8, 2017 / 2:47 pm

    Is it bad that I read “shelfish” as “shellfish” and was mildly disappointed not to see a lobster in elf ears? πŸ˜‚

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