Looking for a one-of-a-kind pet? Why not get an “Explosive” dog, the breed that’s a real blast to own? Available now at Big Bang Puppy Farm, where you can also see our other breeds: “Dynamite,” “Earth-Shattering,” “Must-See,” and “The Feel-Good Film of the Year.”
Suggested by a page of awkward language translations submitted by Murray C. (some NSFW).
I will risk it.
*grabs pup and runs*
OH NO YOU WON’T!!!!!
*pops out and waves tickle fingers in Allein’s direction to cause a startled arms-up reaction; catches pup before it hits the ground and flies away with pup in a stealth hot air balloon*
*shoots down hot air balloon with BB gun, catches pup in one of those fireman’s nets, and leaves on a jet plane*
Joke’s on you, Allein! What you actually stole from me is Tom Cruise wearing an Explosive Pup facial mask. A fact you won’t discover under your plane is over the Pacific. The real pup is right here, with me, where he belongs.
*Insert maniacal laughter*
*Cue Mission Impossible themesong*
*tosses Tom Cruise into a volcano*
*gives up*
Note to self: do NOT mess with Allein or Birdcage. Also, “Never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line!!!”
My great-grandparents came from Sicily around 1903. 😉
Named that after deciding a steady diet of bean burritos wasn’t good for the dog or anyone else around him.
LOL, that was my first thought too – raided his Dad’s lunch box leftovers?
Yeah, me too. My current dog is explosive enough. Room clearingly, silently, explosive.
Now that I think about it. That could be advantageous if there was real danger. Maybe he’s actually trained to make us clear the area!!!
My local mall wants to borrow your dog, to clear out those who don’t understand the concept of “closing”.
I was thinking that chipotle/kidney bean chili was a mistake.
makes me think of that scene from Mr Mom: You gave the baby Chili?
I’m helpless with laughter (initially typed helpful!) over everybody’s comments AND the Bored Panda page. My coworkers now know I’ve lost my mind.
I too have known explosive dogs and cats. Silent but deadly . . .
“There’s no doubt these guys have got some mad translating skills.”
I assume they mean “mad” in the sense of “insane”!
I haven’t gotten past the first picture, but “I can’t find on Google but it’s delicious” is already my favorite. I kinda want to go there for dinner.
Fresh duck with Wikipedia. Yummy!
I thought you were my friend! ?
Moi aussi. I dunno, you guys should start a comedy writing business, specializing in really short parody screenplays.
Reminds me of the “Two thousand year old man routine” from
Mel Brooks and Carl Reiner on the old Steve Allen Show. Lawzy,
that was a good show.
The best.
I’m right there with you, DEBG – I dunno, you guys should start a comedy writing business, specializing in really short parody screenplays.
How “à propos” one of my cats (Penny 10 years old) exploded last night.
By that, I mean she projectile vomited (mostly liquid) all over the floor and the wall.
She seemed fine after and ate as usual this morning so I guess I won’t worry too much but I’ll keep an eye on her just the same.
In our house that’s known as “recreational barfing.” Which, I think, is a term I picked up from a comment at the old ranch. 🙂
My condolences to you both!
One of our cats specialized in stealthily depositing barf in our 1960s shag rug.
My family earned gold medals for: How High Can A Drowsy Barefoot Human Wearing Pajamas Jump In The Middle Of The Night When Stepping On Ice Cold Cat Vomit.
You scored extra points for suppressing your screams of horror so everyone else (including the cat) could sleep on undisturbed.
Same darned spot every single time!!!
Secondary Event: Slow Walking On One Foot And One Heel To Get Paper Towels.
In our house it’s always my husband naked foot that finds the “deposit”.
I, being wise to the ways of my 5 cats, wear slippers ot flip flop at all times!
Well, Faye, at least the cat was thoughtful enough to barf in the same spot each time. Count your blessings!?
Gigi, this has absolutely nothing to do with the current subject, but I just had my
first poutine! We are in Quebec City until tomorrow. Gorgeous weather. Good food.
*sigh*
So glad you’re enjoying yourself!
Ah, one never forgets one’s first poutine! I’m glad you had it in Quebec, too.
I Googled. No clue. Sounds yummy.
It’s French-Canadian comfort food: potatoes , cheese curds,
drenched in hot gravy. Comme maman used to make.
?
Sort equivalent to mac and cheese? – not in content but in its place in the comfort food firmament.
Remember when the Olympics were held in China? It was great sport for news teams to go around taking images of store fronts’ and open-air food markets’ names – they were gut-bustlingly funny. I can only imagine if the situation were reversed that our translations might be pretty amusing to the Chinese.
PS Sorry about my double post above – I was having trouble – kept saying I’d’ already posted but it wouldn’t leave the little comment box – kept telling me I’d already said that – so I changed it slightly and now there are 2 posts.
Bob Newhart has produced some of the best comedy bits.No foul language either!
What kills me is that “The Buttoned Down Mind” was his first time doing stand up in front of people.
Nice Catholic boys like him don’t hang out in nightclubs.
THAT was awesome!! Laughed so hard at the shell part!?
I just read all the translation fails, and I’m CRYING at my desk from trying to stifle my laughter.
I had the same reaction. Maybe that’s what the NSFW warning was *really* about.
Great! All my pop up ads are now in Chinese!
When I met my husband, he’d been living in Japan. You can only imagine the beauties he’d collected in that time. Such as the windsurfing company, Break Wind. The delivery company (I swear I am not making this up), Lapid Expless. The building that had the figures of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves on it with Doc looking up Snow White’s skirt. And my all-time favorite, the t-shirt I got in a Japanese shop that says, “They live With Specific purposes, being supported By these the bestkind OF PersOnalities Are completed.” Proof is attached. 🙂
In the train station, did you come across the one toilet with an English sign proudly announcing that this was a “Western Style Chamber Pot”????? 😀 😀
What amazes me about those mistranslations is many are SO CLOSE! There should always be a native speaker in the translation department! My favorite was the sign about not stepping on the grass cos it was dreaming.?
My fav, from many years ago: When Coca-Cola was first introduced to China the U.S. company came up with the Chineses characters that would represent each letter of COKE. Unfortunately, since the characters can have more than one meaning, what was written in Chinese on the pop cans was “Bite the wax tadpole”. ? I would be wary of buying clothing–or tattoos!–with Asian characters translated in the U.S.!
I think there should be a bumper sticker that says “Bite the Wax Tadpole”, maybe in Coca Cola script, white on red.
“Bite the wax tadpole” became a phrase my sister and I used to say just to crack each other up!
Right up there with “Incubating sprinklers”!
Yes.
No touchy da fishy?
But I want to touchy the fishy! Why I no touchy the fishy?
Here touchy ???⛵️
Talking about funny translations, especially for dish menus or road signs, China never fails to deliver. Be ready to get lost between the “Racist Park” and the “South Grate”. Checkout a huge list of 140 photos (https://www.actranslation.com/knowledge/fun/hilarious-translations.htm) for this sort of hilarious translation fails that you could encounter in China and enjoy some good laughter! I had a few joyful days after finding this. 🙂
Don’t rely on machine translations when the matters discussed do matter – couldn’t agree more! These photos are just perfect examples.