Guide for Evil Supervillain Pets

In the world of espionage and international blackmail, two things are true: 1. Megalomaniacal supervillians love their cats; and 2. Megalomaniacal supervillians always get caught. In situations like these you, the cat, are generally on your own, and must find some way to return to lawful society without being recognized. To be prepared for this eventuality, maintain an emergency kit containing food rations, cash, and some form of disguise, such as the mask modeled here by “Mr. Wrinklebottom.”

Hello, I’m a completely normal cat who is not evil. How are you?

Via Imgur. (I can’t find a credible back story for this picture, so I can only assume that the cat was shaved for a medical procedure and its face was spared.)

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25 thoughts on “Guide for Evil Supervillain Pets

  1. Dana May 12, 2017 / 10:50 am

    I don’t know what to make of this. I hope the owner did it for a good reason, like because its fur was matted or something and not just to take a funny picture.

    • allein ? May 12, 2017 / 10:55 am

      My cousin’s daughter was telling us about how her one cat was recently shaved because of matting, and she came home looking different and smelling like other animals at the groomer, and the other cat kept hissing at her. She looks like a lion.

      This is why I like short-haired pets.

    • Blue Footed Booby May 12, 2017 / 11:07 am

      It’ll grow back. vOv

  2. allein ? May 12, 2017 / 10:51 am

    Hehee…poor thing…I’m not laughing at you…lol…hahahaha….no really I swear…

    *collapses in giggle-fit*

    Those people better lock up their shoes.

    • beemoused May 12, 2017 / 1:52 pm

      I snorted ice water out my nose when I saw this, but I don’t know who to feel more sorry for–the poor kitty or his peoples because if looks could kill, they’d already be dead!

  3. debg May 12, 2017 / 11:05 am

    Hey, my muffin top has eyes!

    • Murray C May 12, 2017 / 12:42 pm

      ?Ya got me on that one, DEBG!

  4. Gigi the cat lady May 12, 2017 / 11:12 am

    It actually took me a couple of second to figure out what I was looking at LOL!

    I do have to shave my T-Two every Spring because his fur gets badly matted because he really hates being brushed, he actually prefers getting shaved to being brushed. Here’s a photo of him from a few years ago.

    • Brouhaha May 12, 2017 / 11:22 am

      My kitty hates being brushed too, but she is a shorthair, so not as big of a deal. Still, very envious of all the videos of blissful kitty brushins on the internets.

      • Emmberrann May 12, 2017 / 4:50 pm

        My late geriatric cat loved his brush. He was not long-haired, but he got brushed every night at bedtime. It kept down the floating floof, and the hairball factor. And he loooved it! It was our bonding time.

    • Blue Footed Booby May 12, 2017 / 12:13 pm

      My parents have the same problem with their elderly collie-greyhound mix. Mom wants to shave him for this reason and also his comfort, but Dad vehemently opposes. People always complement what a handsome dog he is, and he’d feel bad if dog looked like a muppet. Which he *totally* would.

    • Laura May 12, 2017 / 1:17 pm

      What a pretty baby, Gigi! I particularly like the floof at the tip of the tail — it looks like you left him a nice flyswatter!

    • julie May 12, 2017 / 6:08 pm

      This picture of T-Two is HILARIOUS!!

  5. Doug May 12, 2017 / 11:15 am

    What in the “Hairy” Heck ??

    Poor little guy

  6. Duckie ? May 12, 2017 / 11:47 am

    Thought it was a Schnauzer with a cat mask on!

  7. Smartypants May 12, 2017 / 12:40 pm

    “Ah, I see you signed me up for the Witless Protection Program? Prepare to die, puny hoomin!”

  8. Laura May 12, 2017 / 1:23 pm

    For once, I can’t find it in me to disagree too vehemently with the multiple downvotes.

    Although I can think of multiple reasons why it might be done — a matted stray or just a kitty who hates brushing, medical reasons, even someone who thinks (erroneously) kitty would be more comfortable in hot weather. But there’s no excuse for leaving the face like that!

    • Elaine C Williamson May 12, 2017 / 3:03 pm

      There was an excuse, the cat’s whiskers.

      • 6rabbits May 12, 2017 / 10:52 pm

        Yes; that seems to be the consensus on Imgur as well. Wish the poster would clear up the mystery of why, though. Suggestions for the shaving that make sense: rolled in paint or tar, and skunk. (Suprised at the number of down votes!)

  9. mariser May 12, 2017 / 1:28 pm

    this is a seriously disturbing image. as in it will haunt my dreams.

    • Duckie ? May 12, 2017 / 1:38 pm

      Photoshopped!

  10. Patty May 12, 2017 / 3:40 pm

    That is the worst hair cut in the world. It makes a funny picture, but it sure is ugly. I’m glad they didn’t shave the face too. That said, it’s just a haircut. The cat isn’t physically or emotionally damaged by it, it will grow back.
    As far as brushing long haired cats, Callie loves the brush (when she isn’t trying to play with it), her mother, Alice (my daughter’s cat) hates the brush. My other daughter’s cat, Tubby, brushes himself, if you hold the brush up so he can rub himself on it. His sister, Girl likes brushed, even though she is short haired.

    • allein ? May 12, 2017 / 3:42 pm

      My other daughter’s cat, Tubby, brushes himself, if you hold the brush up so he can rub himself on it.

      Stars will do that with the lint roller. I don’t know why she loves it so much, but if she hears you rolling your clothes (most likely to get her fur off you) she will come running and cry if you don’t roll her.

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