Is it fair to share a chair if there’s somebody there? Do you care if I dare plant my dog derriere where there’s scant space to share? If you make me aware, I can bring a spare chair. Then we’ll both sit and stare.

Stella and Roxy, by alden0249, licensed under CC BY 2.0

Pampered pup Poppy is a perfect princess, and now it’s time for her to enjoy the most redonkulous bedtime routine ever, in this video found by reader A9.

“Miss Flacknacker, call my broker and buy another 5,000 shares of Amalgamated Squeakytoy! Then bring me the contracts on the Chew-Eeze merger! And come light my cigar, do I have to do everything around here?!”