Just Keep Functioning, Just Keep Functioning…

  1. NIKE AIR MAX TAILWINDMarch 8, 2016 / 3:30 am

    Keep functioning ,fantastic job!

    • NOT THAT MIKE THE OTHER MIKEMarch 13, 2016 / 9:41 pm

      Dear Mr. Tailwind:

      Thank you for your kind wishes. I enjoy functioning, and indeed my current plans call for me to remain functioning for the foreseeable future as I find that this condition affords a greater range of career and recreational possibilities compared to my colleagues in the non-functioning community.

      In fact, I regard functioning to be so vital to my aspirations that I have adopted a mental regimen to verify that I remain in a functioning state, employing a memory aid, also known as a mnemonic. This mnemonic takes the form of the phrase “I am capable of performing cognitive functions, and therefore this is evidence that I remain in a functioning state of existence.” It is a cumbersome phrase, I must regretfully admit, and I am casting about for a shorter and more memorable means of expressing it.

      This task and many others should should assure my functioning for many years to come, and you may be certain that I will crayon toadstool turkey baster blort blort f’tweep ehpppppppp;hekwwwkhlkajhe)gg&+++++++++++++ NO CARRIER

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15 thoughts on “Just Keep Functioning, Just Keep Functioning…

  1. allein March 14, 2016 / 10:00 am

    Um…I think something malfunctioned.

    Is there someone who can try unplugging Mike and plugging him back in?

  2. Gigi_the cat lady March 14, 2016 / 10:00 am

    Darn! My NTMTOM just broke down, I hope the Geek Squad can fix him fast.

  3. Smartypants March 14, 2016 / 10:14 am

    That mnemonic – well done!

    I snorted out loud at the third para – definitely one for the coffee table book.

  4. debg March 14, 2016 / 10:33 am

    Mr. Tailwind is the wind beneath our wings?

    • Maya March 14, 2016 / 10:53 am

      No, he is the wind beneath our tails! 🙂

      • allein March 14, 2016 / 11:03 am

        That’s…not usually a wind you want to be behind.

        • debg March 14, 2016 / 11:19 am

          You are so right.

  5. Clairdelune March 14, 2016 / 12:02 pm

    Mike: **This mnemonic takes the form of the phrase “I am capable of performing cognitive functions, and therefore this is evidence that I remain in a functioning state of existence.” **
    Hmm, given the total failure that occurred at the end – covered up with a lame “NO CARRIER” message, I have some friendly advice: ditch the overlong mnemonic, simply pinch yourself in a delicate spot – if it hurts, you KNOW you are fully functioning.
    YES, YOU ARE FUNCTIONING AND LOVED!!! 😀 😀

      • Ricky's Mom March 14, 2016 / 1:09 pm
        • birdcage March 14, 2016 / 4:55 pm

          That was so bizarre. Maybe it’s the time change, maybe it’s the raw food cleanse that I’m doing, but I laughed like a hyena.

  6. Ilonka March 14, 2016 / 3:02 pm

    *splurts coffee* 😏

  7. Alison March 14, 2016 / 3:24 pm

    Spam bots everywhere are dreaming of being featured on your site.

  8. Saffron March 15, 2016 / 10:06 am

    Stay functioning, Pony Boy.

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