Cuddles Are Coming

In the cold, frozen wastes to the north of the Wall of Westeros, they wait and watch. Their pale blue eyes, bluer than the most perfect ice, sweep the horizon for any human foolish enough to travel alone. So if you must venture beyond the Wall, look sharp — lest you fall into the clutches of… the White Pouncers.

See, we’re like White Walkers except we pounce.

Via Imgur.

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The Mystic Will See You Now

Greetings, seekers of truth. The all-knowing Oracle of Flazeem knows why you have come, otherwise I’d only be the mostly-knowing Oracle of Flazeem and that doesn’t sound like a guy you’d climb to the top of this mountain to meet, so let’s get on with it…

I assume you brought cash. No Bitcoin, please.

You seek the answer to the riddle of the universe, which I shall now reveal by peering across time and space with the aid of the mystical Cone of Wahdeedoodah. You may want to get a pencil and write this down…

mhrrpth hluurph flurfl sglurrrrgh ig slorrth thrrgh uth mluuugthl…

DSC_0048, by lindsayloveshermac, licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0

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I Absolve Thee

I don’t blame you. I’m sure you meant well. You didn’t know better. You were just doing what you thought was right. You’re still new at this. It was peer pressure. Mistakes were made. You were only following orders. In a broader sense, society is at fault. I’m just telling you this so you’ll know there are no hard feelings.

Nah, just kidding. I’m poopin’ in your shoes tonight.

Big ripe squishy one too, ya jerk.

What an angel-face, Andrew Y.

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Links: YOO BOOPS NAO KAY?

And finally: You Saw it, Didn’t You?

Oh yeah, Amy F., I definitely saw… it… whatever it was.

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