Ever since the accident, I’ve wondered if I did the right thing. I mean, when you fall into a vat of toxic waste mixed with hot dog vendor water and just walk away, you want to think there’s some higher purpose at work. That you were meant for something — fighting crime, protecting the innocent — something meaningful.
It’s not even like I have any useful super-powers, either. Yeah, I can survive a long time in boiling water — whoop-dee-dingle-doo. You know how many villains in this town attack people with boiling water? Somewhere between bupkis and zip, that’s how many.
And you try having a secret identity when you’re built like a hot dog. I mean, it’s not like I can just blend in, you know? Now, Superman, he just puts on the glasses, and bing! he’s like, Mr. Normal, he can go to Starbucks, do whatever he wants. Oh, but not me. Everybody knows where I work, where I live, I got people yelling at me from their cars, harassing me at home… and not even proper death threats — at least that would be dignified. No, my big nemesis is some punk kids from down the block who leave a flaming bag of mustard on my front porch and ring the bell. Yeah, nice going, evildoers.
This sucks.
French Hot Dog, by Thomas Leuthard, licensed under CC BY 2.0
Flaming bag of mustard! 🙂
Oh my gosh!…..I’m really lovin’ this “Not Cute” stuff! 😀
If only the back story of what we see around us was like this…
I’d eat that. Wait, that came out wrong.
Can we please discuss the CREPE wrapped around that poor hot dog?! The meat to bread ratio is gonna be waaaaaaaay off, silly Frenchies.
NO CREPES!
Ah ha ha ha! I *love* Edna Mode!
Make that silly Swedes because it’s from my native country.
Yes, this is a very good site indeed. You have the qte AND this kinda stuff I love.
Oooh, and I see you can reply to others. Nice!
Whoop-dee-dingle-doo… ha ha ha! Loving this new not so cute category
Every superhero need a sidekick
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HAHAHAHAHAHA! That was too good not to share, so I embedded that here so we can all look easily.
It’s Weinerman’s trusty sidekick, Fryboy!
Ugh. That NTMTOM, his humor is the wurst!
I see what you did there, Jen8
Weinerman has a sadz! Maybe he can look at life with more relish! And onions. Don’t forget onions. What’s the chances of getting that picture? Amazing.
Is it being wrapped in a crepe that makes it a French hot dog?
They don’t make sidekicks like that anymore.
Fryboy looks like he had a swig or two of something before showing up for work.
This is AWESOME! Cute AND twisted all in one site. I love, love, LOVE it!!
Great description. Cute AND Twisted. I’m in. Lol
Yay! Best of both worlds.
I agree, Phred’s Mom! Now the only thing I miss to feel really great is a pun (or two, or thousand) by Oakley260 🙂