The Story of Good Dog

… then, with all his strength, Good Dog leaped up and caught the ball. “Good dog!” said Timmy. “That ball would have knocked me off my bike!”

“Good dog!” said Mr. Cooper. “I would have swerved in front of that bus to miss Timmy!”

“Good dog!” said the bus driver. “Mr. Cooper would have rammed my bus onto the train tracks!”

“Good dog!” said the train engineer. “My cargo of nuclear fuel would have plunged into the ravine!”

“Good dog!” said the nuclear power plant operator. “Without that fuel, we were just seconds from a core meltdown!”

“Good dog!” said the shadowy government agent. “If we’d lost power, that would have deactivated the 50,000-gigawatt containment matrix in which lies the astral wanderer Yorrgh zik-Toroth, the immortal demi-being whose insatiable hunger for souls leads it across the galaxy, leaving agony and total destruction in its wake!”

“We were supposed to have backup power, but there were budget cuts…” (via Imgur)
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28 thoughts on “The Story of Good Dog

  1. allein ? March 9, 2018 / 9:33 am

    Priceless.. I wanna go to doggie storytime. They should do this at Barnes & Noble..

      • allein ? March 9, 2018 / 9:58 am

        🙂

      • Benvolio March 9, 2018 / 10:22 am

        Mine too!!

      • Jendeyan March 9, 2018 / 11:10 am

        I’ve heard about that. I hear it’s really successful with children who struggle with reading because the dog is a non-judgemental audience the children can read to. Which helps them gain confidence. Dogs really are superheroes!

        • Ricky's Mom March 10, 2018 / 5:46 am

          This is what Ricky did as my assistant—provide a non-judgmental, often just plain adoring, audience, for my clients, whether children or adults. I was surprised when he turned out to be such an asset to my business! And I’m sorry that he has decided to retire, but he certainly earned his retirement.

      • Smartypants March 9, 2018 / 11:58 am

        Cool – mine too!

  2. Juno March 9, 2018 / 9:36 am

    NOMTOM, you are too much!

  3. michael March 9, 2018 / 10:19 am

    NOMTOM, please promise that someday you will NOT write a children’s book.

    • allein ? March 9, 2018 / 10:23 am

      It’s a good thing I was not yet sipping my tea when I read that…

    • Dana March 9, 2018 / 10:25 am

      That’s a children’s book I would buy.

    • Blue Footed Booby March 9, 2018 / 1:33 pm

      Don’t say that! What will the little twisted children like I was read!

      • allein ? March 9, 2018 / 1:34 pm

        Right? I would totally read my kids a NOMTOM book.

        …It’s probably good that I don’t actually have kids…

        • debg March 9, 2018 / 9:58 pm

          Right there with you, Allein.

          • Ricky's Mom March 10, 2018 / 5:47 am

            I would read that book to kids
            I would read that book to Sids
            I would read it, Yes I would
            NTMTOM’s book is just
            that
            good

            • Clairdelune July 4, 2018 / 1:57 pm

              Yeay! I would have read it as a kid, yes I would.
              I would read it as a loony adult yes I would.

  4. Dana March 9, 2018 / 10:22 am

    OH MY!!!! Was not prepared for so much cute!!!!

  5. Shan March 9, 2018 / 11:14 am

    LOL NOMTOM!

  6. Gigi The cat lady March 9, 2018 / 11:36 am

    Good dog! said Yorrgh zik-Toroth. “If they’d lost power they would have figured out that I can leave anytime I want, like NOW!”

    • Smartypants March 9, 2018 / 11:59 am

      Aha…didn’t see THAT coming! 😀

  7. Duckie ? March 9, 2018 / 11:38 am

    I wish there was a way to keep some puppies and kittens a specific age all their lives. You wait until the fluffball achieves desired age, then wave the magic wand, and poof! Fluffy puppy forever! Toddling kitten forever!

    • Sumo-Mermaid March 9, 2018 / 1:40 pm

      I recently fostered a dog who seemed to embody your idea. She was a 12 year old Bichon Frise who was so matted when she arrived at the humane society, they had to shave her. She was so cute that way, she did look like many newborn puppy breeds. If I owned one, I’d keep it in that cut. Even tho’ she was older, she had a very puppy-ish temperament. I was almost a foster fail with that one!

  8. Beth March 9, 2018 / 12:50 pm

    It started well, that sentence…I mean, story. ? Yeah, it kind of got away…

    So, what is really keeping eight glorious golden puppies so attentive? Snausages? I’m thinking Snausages…

  9. dubravkamcvmd March 9, 2018 / 1:57 pm

    Another post that reinforces the maxim “Never look at the picture before you read the caption.”

    • Ricky's Mom March 10, 2018 / 5:48 am

      Tru dat.

  10. Emsthemonster March 9, 2018 / 4:57 pm

    Brilliant story, I would definitely buy Mike’s book!

    I would have a hard time to read it aloud to the audience though, when I could cuddle them instead.

  11. debg March 9, 2018 / 10:01 pm

    Folks, I’ll repeat this story on the Caturday open thread, but it’s too good not to share tonight! Prepare to be jealous.

    Went to Petsmart for cat stuff and right behind me in the checkout line, there was a lady, her son, and a corgi puppy. They were getting the puppy Brody a collar, then taking it to her mother, who was very excited about her new baby. Brody was so young, his ears didn’t stand up straight yet. I got to pet him and he licked my hands. Then, as I was leaving, the lady INVITED ME TO HOLD HIM, because he was so soft and cuddly. That got me some inadvertent French kisses–Brody luvs him some people. It was the highlight of my whole week.

    • allein ? March 9, 2018 / 10:05 pm

      I am so jealous! Sometimes I go into PetSmart in hopes of getting to pet a doggo, but I’ve never gotten to hold one!

      There was a woman who came into one of the bookstores I worked in with her Chihuahua, Rosie, once in a while. She let me hold her once while she went to get coffee (dogs were allowed in the store but not in the cafe). 🙂

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