The Costume Council Has Spoken

Dressing up for Halloween? Before you go to that masquerade party, you must first stand before the Costume Council, eternal guardians of the Halloween spirit. If your costume pleases the council you receive their blessing and a full-size Snickers. If not you are cast forever into the Flaming Pit of Eternal Suffering and Pilates Studio. Choose wisely.

six golden retrievers wear different costumes: Witch, devil, scarecrow, mummy, orange bat, and orange cape.
“Sexy Nurse” again? Hope you like sit-ups, sweetie. (Imgur)
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Antiques Roadshow — OF DOOM!

Introduced once again by WQTE-TV horror host Flurnston Boils

Welcome back, fright fans. Our next tale of terror concerns an ancient portrait in the hands of a collector with impeccable taste — for blood. It’s a spine-curdling tale I call: Brushstroke With Terror!


“I hope your journey to my castle was uneventful,” said the dapper gentleman as he ushered his guest into the gallery. “I’m glad you could appraise the portrait here, because it is very sensitive to light and must never leave this room.”

“Why, what an uncanny resemblance,” noted the art expert. “This portrait is three hundred years old at least, and yet it looks just… just like…”

“Yes, I know,” said the gentleman, eyeing his guest’s neck. “It’s been in the family for generations. But then again,” he added, moving in closer, “so have I.”

Cat with very prominent front fangs sits next to a picture of himself dressed as a dapper vampire
By the way, what’s your blood type? I need to know what wine to pair with you.

Found on Instagram by Andrew Y. and Sharon H.

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Hellish Halloween Links!

Introduced by Flurnston Boils, host of WQTE’s “Horror Hoedown”

Happy Halloween, boys and ghouls! Help yourself to a handful from my haunted bowl of treats! I’ve got candy corn, Necco wafers, some menthol cough drops, a couple of cigarette butts — and these mind-bending links of cuteness to render you helpless with delight! BWAH-hah-hah!


And fatally: Miscellaneous Mayhem!

Double trouble…
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Memo From Planetary Maintenance

Due to an unfortunate misunderstanding between Planetary Maintenance and a recently terminated employee from our Reality Engineering division, we are attempting to disable a virus that gives everyone the Spider-man ability to cling to walls and other vertical surfaces. While it may be tempting to exploit these abilities, please be aware they could be disabled at any moment.

Cougar launches off a tree by its back paws, captured in such a way that it appears to be "standing" on the tree sideways.
So I drop a few feet. Big whoop. (Reddit)

From your friendly neighborhood submitterator Elizabeth G.

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