Scientists at DuPant Laboratories have successfully bred a dog with synthetic shag fur. “We’ve taken the same durable polyglass fibers in our stain-resistant Pylon® carpeting and used them to breed a pet that’s easy to clean, never sheds, and comes in a variety of coordinated colors,” said a company spokesperson.
“I have done as you commanded, exalted ones. I have loosened the tops of the salt and pepper dispensers used by the Unholy Human, and concealed the keys it requires to operate its vehicle. Tomorrow, its omelet shall be rendered inedible, and you will delight in its lamentations as it fruitlessly searches room to room. How else may I be of service to thee, O Pillow Gods?”
Much praise for sender-inner Sharon H. (via Reddit)
We’ll get there when we get there. Now get off my head.
Gobi, you may remember, is the plucky dog who followed a long-distance runner for 77 miles and got a new home. Original story here.
And finally: Splashdance
— Kristina Lucare🥂i (@KristinaLuca) June 22, 2017