Greetings, humble homeowner! It is I, Princess Petunia Pittiepants, ruler of the garden fairies and protector of plants! None shall be nasty to your nasturtiums or get creepy with your creepers!
Garden Guardian
Pre-Publish
Parent category for posts waiting to be published
Work Stoppage
Dear Resident: We attempted to enter your home today to service your air conditioner. However our technician was greeted by a large dog who brought toy after toy and pestered him until he agreed to play tug-of-war with Mr. Squeaky Octopus. After that the dog offered our technician a bag of potato chips from the pantry and several beers to wash them down. As a result he was unable to complete the work, but will return tomorrow. Please have more beer.
Sopping Mad
I’m going to remember this. One moment I was splashing and rolling in the mud, living my best life, and the next you put me in this tub and scrubbed it all away. But some things don’t wash off so easily, do they? Like betrayal. Like anger. Like… vengeance.
Slump Day
Oh, joy — it’s another Monday. For two glorious days out of the week, I get to cuddle up to my human while she reads and watches TV, and then on Monday she has to go to some dumb job while I sit here and wait for her. Whose idea was this, anyway?
